Monday, 23 December 2013

2013 Was The Year The Stars Went Shirtless

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No shirt, no problem.
Photos: @nickiminaj's Isntagram/Teen Vogue/@mileycyrus's Instagram
Wanna know what your favorite pop stars WON'T be putting on their Christmas lists this year? Shirts. Why? Because they hate them. JK! Hate is a strong word. They just prefer not to wear them all the time. And based on the way some celebs have been stripping down recently, going sans shirt isn't just for the beach anymore—it's a full-blown, anytime trend.

"Once, in the long-gone 'Mad Men' days, it was considered de rigueur for New Yorkers to wear a hat and gloves in town," The New York Times commented on widespread shirtlessness in July. "Now dress codes have devolved to the point where folks wear fleecy slippers on the subway, flip-flops to the ballet, running tights for every occasion, repurposed pajamas as daywear and, recently, very little at all." First of all, what's wrong with wearing running tights for every occasion? Second of all, people are wearing flip-flops to the ballet?! Now THAT is cray. I feel much less embarrassed about showing off my new hamburger-shaped pasties at work. KIDDING, of course. Because much like the curtain skirt, walking around without a shirt is definitely a celebrity-centric trend that's best left to the professionals. Let's take a look to see how they've tackled it this year, shall we?
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Shirts? PSH.
Photos:'Elle' UK/Getty Images/@nickiminaj's Instagram/@mariahcarey's Instagram
Believe or not, it's 100% legal for females in New York to walk around topless. (It's meant to ~encourage gender equality~ in public spaces.) So, while seeing someone like Rihanna out shopping in Soho wearing only a top-buttoned letterman jacket may seem a little salacious, she's barely even pushing the envelope by NYC standards. I mean, come on! This is the home of The Naked Cowboy, after all. (He's not really naked though, FYI. He wears tightie whities. Just sayin'.)
It is, however, pushing the envelope when it comes to sartorial trends. Seeing topless models on catwalks and in high fashion magazine editorials is nothing new—but seeing a star go without a shirt on the street? That's just a nip slip waiting to happen. In addition to Rihanna, the other stars on #TeamShirtless this year (like Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey) have also chosen to use outerwear as only-wear, opting to go sans shirt under garments like tuxedo jackets, blazers and cropped leather vests. Bare (heh) in mind though, that these are some of the same celebs who are often seen without pants. (Or in the case of Miley's recent performances, rarely seen WITH pants.) So, taking the topless law to the limit definitely isn't out of the question.
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Pastie party!
Photso: Getty Images/@nickiminaj's Instagram
Another way stars embraced the shirtless trend this year was with pasties. Turns out, they're not just for burlesque shows anymore! PHEW. I've been waiting SO LONG for the rest of the world to catch on to adhesive aerola covers, haven't you? I mean, look at all the different shapes and sizes they come in! Even better, they're totally versatile. In September, Miley Cyrus wore a circular black pair under a long sleeve mesh dress to perform at the iHeart Radio fest AND with tattered jeans and a white crop top for her Bangerz release party. Do you know any other accessory that can transition from work to play so seamlessly?
The other route is following the lead of Nicki Minaj, who's also a fan of pasites. It's clear, though, that her Minajesty prefers a "less is more" approach to the trend (*ACHEM* the trend where less is already way less than what everyone else is wearing, BTW). Remember the time she showed off a pair of purple, star-shaped, leopard-print pasties wearing nothing but several layers of gold chains? I still can't decide which accessory was more impressive. Later in the same month, Nicki wore a pair of simple, black, plus-shaped pasties for her Halloween costume, which appeared to be a cross between a police officer and a dominatrix.
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The boys are in on the trend.
Photo: @austinmahone's Instagram/@justinbieber's Instagram/@maxthewanted's Instagram
It's super important to note that this year's rampant shirtless trend was not relegated to the ladies either. If anything, the dudes were even MORE vigilant about it. Except sadly (for them, not us), there's really only one way to wear it: straight-up, full-on, totally topless. Sure, it's not like seeing guys without their shirts on is anything new, so long as your at the pool or whatever. But it seems like in 2013, guys went out of their way to make sure we got a good, long glimpse at their (often rock-hard) abs. We're not complaining.
Take teenage cutie Austin Mahone and Max George from The Wanted, for example. Both dudes flexed their stomachs for shirtless pics to remind us that in between singing, dancing, touring and sleeping, they also manage to work on their fitness. #overachievers And sure, their abs are great and all, but the most crucial part of the sans shirt dude selfie is the underwear band. It's suggestive and a throwback to the '90s and sagging.
Of course, you can't talk about shirtlessness in 2013 without Justin Bieber, and speaking specifically to the underwear band criteria, The Biebs is a PRO. Just look at his form on that segway! Even with a vehicular object blocking us from a clear view, he made sure to angle his body (and flex his abs) in such a way that allows us to check out his manties. Then again, the Biebs is pretty much a pro at being shirtless 24/7, so we're not really surprised by his exceptional underwear band aptitude.
Miley Cyrus, Rihanna, Justin Timberlake, Robin Thicke, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian
The Shirtless Videos of 2013.
Photos: RCA Records/Island Def Jam Records/Star Trak/Def Jam Records/
The topless trend left no stone unturned in 2013, infiltrating our streets, our magazines, our Instagram feeds, and perhaps most glaringly, our favorite music videos. Some of the biggest bangers and most iconic visuals of the year featured topless (and yes, sometimes fully naked) ladies: Miley Cyrus' "Wrecking Ball," Rihanna's "Stay," Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines," Justin Timberlake's "Tunnel Vision" and Kanye West's "Bound 2." Not to be overlooked, CGI Yeezy also took off his shirt for the "Black Skinhead" video, and (OF COURSE) Bieber had a shirtless, pelvis-thrusting moment in "All That Matters." Here's to whatever trends lie in store for 2014, which we're guessing will either be 100% unabashed nudity OR the complete opposite end of the spectrum: swinging the cultural pendulum toward ULTIMATE CONSERVATIVE DRESS! "Skin is so 2013, amirite??" - Future People


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